Family Weekend

The weekend is coming to an end, and so I am preparing to start off my new week...

Friday was a nice, relaxing day.  We enjoyed our morning at Lido Beach with our usual beach and pool, and then prepared everything to head back home.  The ride wasn't too long, even though the numerous rain spots we went through slowed us down a little bit.  We ended the night with a family dinner and getting settled back in.

A bike ride is how Saturday morning began, followed by a home cooked meal for lunch and then a trip to the mall.  There, I met up with a high school friend whom I had not seen in over ten years.  While meeting up with him and introducing him to the family, we saw another high school friend who joined us for the afternoon.  It was lovely catching up, remembering old times, laughing and talking about the present and our plans for the future.  We ended this very nice day with a big family and friend gathering.  We went out to dinner @ a great Japanese restaurant, and then headed home to put the baby to sleep and begin our long hours of kareoke.  I had never done kareoke, and started off a little slow, but amazingly ended the night laughing, "singing" and even dancing a little.  Fortunately, I KNOW how bad I sounded, so I will not attach any videos taken during that event.

Sunday was laid back as well.  Spent time with the family.  Watched the soccer match between Spain and S. Africa.  Laid out by the pool.  Played with Isabella.  Home cooked meal.  Soccer match between BRASIL and USA - sorry, even though it was a good match, we took the cup again!  My mother, aunt and cousin stopped by for a nice afternoon visit. 

Looking forward to this new week and what life has to offer...

Restaurant: Sushi Tom (Weston, FL)

Lido Beach - Part IV

Such a beautiful day, yet so much sad news in the media...

We started off our day with our usual morning routine: breakfast, fun, getting dressed, heading to the beach and pool.  It was extremely hot today, but the water was nice and warm, and the ocean was calm.  Isabella did not want to be at the beach or out in the sun, so we played under the shade for a while and then she headed to the pool and then in for a nap.  Lia, my sister-in-law, and I did our morning walk on the beach and then headed to the pool ourselves.  

While having lunch, we heard the sad news that Farrah Fawcett passed away this morning.  Soon after that, we watched the soccer match between Brasil and South Africa and were relieved that the score turned out to be 1-0 (not a very entertaining match I must say).  Before heading back out to the beach for a while, we heard the second sad news of the day, that Michael Jackson passed away as well.  May they rest in peace.

Upon our return from the beach, we all got dressed up and ready for a nice dinner at the hotel's Lido Beach Grille.  The restaurant is absolutely beautiful, the food delicious and the views of the beach and city of Sarasota were gorgeous.  It had been a while since I had seen such a breath taking sunset! 

We decided that since this is our last night here, on this trip, that we would take a stroll on the beach at night.  

"Sad to say, I'm on my way...won't be back, for many a day..."    

Lido Beach - Part III

I have to admit, even though I am truly enjoying this vacation, I'm starting to feel sad just thinking about how it will soon be over.  It's been a long time since I've been able to just sit at the beach or pool and relax. Yes, I know, I have a baby to watch, but with family here, helping us, it makes things so much easier.

Again today, we went to the beach and pool in the morning.  The water was warm at the beach, and the waves were not too strong.  We hung out there for a good hour, before heading back into the hotel to goto the pool.  Since the baby was getting sleepy, we accepted the help offered and sent her off for a nap. Today was my husband's "day to cook", so he went in as well, and I set off on another walk and chat with my sister-in-law.  Lunch was great!  We started with an avocado and shrimp w/sauce salad, leading to an aglio-olio pasta with artichoke hearts and shrimp.  White wine accompanied this meal, making it a delicious lunch for a day at the beach.   

A walk to St. Armand's Circle came next, even though it started to get very hot.  We went to Kilwin's to get some ice cream and walked around "town" again.  We headed back to the hotel to get some rest and then headed out to the beach and pool again.  In the evening, we drove into Sarasota and then headed to dinner at Siesta Key's: Siesta Village.  It was a beautiful little place, with a main street full of bars and restaurants. We opted to have some pizza and sangria at a restaurant called Napoli.

Once we got to the hotel and put the baby to sleep, my sister-in-law, husband, Gus, and I went to sit out at the beach for a while. This was around 10pm.  The climate was nice, not too hot or humid.  We sat on the soft sand and stared at the stars, the crescent, orangish moon and heard the waves break on shore while we chatted and hung out.  As if this were not enough, Gus decided to dive into the pool, clothes and all to end our day.  As we would say back home, "fechou com chave de ouro". 

Looking forward to another day tomorrow in this little piece of paradise.  Actually thinking this would be a great place to come back to for a long weekend or short holiday... 

Lido Beach - Part II

After a good night sleep, I woke up this morning to a smiling baby.  It's such a joy to have Isabella in my life, and to have her smiling and laughing constantly.  We got up and greeted everyone (it's a family vacation) and then had some breakfast.  Once that was over, we started our new adventure for the day. Sunblock, swim diapers, bathing suit, hat, toys, etc...after almost an hour of having gotten out of bed, we headed out to the beach.  

The day was a little cloudy, but the sun was still burning strong.  As we got closer to the beach, we saw that the waves were strong and big, and decided to stay on shore.  Isabella had a ton of fun running up to the water and then back to us - I'm so glad she finally got over her dislike of sand.  After a while, I headed to the pool with her and we enjoyed some mommy and daughter time splashing in the water.  A walk on the beach with my sister-in-law came next, and I have to say I enjoyed catching up with her and talking about life in general.  Work, relationships, Isabella, economy, etc...just relaxing and enjoying the soft sand under our feet and the sound of the waves breaking a couple of feet away from us.  

We decided to go into St. Armand's Circle again for lunch.  This time we went to another cozy restaurant, where we had a variety of pasta, some with seafood, chicken, white sauce, red sauce - all delicious!  Since it was too hot and humid for a walk right then and there, we headed back to the hotel for a nap.  The afternoon ended once again with some fun at the beach and pool, and then some homemade food.  To end this second night of vacation, we headed into St. Armand's Circle for a stroll and some ice cream.  I hope the weather will continue to be as beautiful as it has been these past two days, so we may continue to enjoy this little paradise.

Restaurant:  Crab & Fin

Lido Beach

Today I discovered a new place - a wonderful and cozy beach in the west coast of Florida called Lido Beach. Even though I live close to both Miami and Fort Lauderdale beaches, which are absolutely beautiful, this beach has its unique quirks that make it a special place.  After only a three hour drive - and yes, I must admit, a boring drive since the view did not change much - we arrived at a very nice hotel in this wonderful new little paradise.  The white sand that leads to the beach is softer than any other sand I had walked on before.  Even though it has little shells and pieces of shells everywhere, it's soft and smooth.  The water is a greenish-blue, with beautiful breaking waves and warm as can be.  

Once settled in, we decided to go into St. Armand's Circle to grab a bite to eat, and there, we found a delicious restaurant where we had lunch.   After a quick nap, we went to the beach and enjoyed the warm water and played on the soft sand (we actually attempted our first sand castle with Isabella) and ended our afternoon with a dive in the pool (also quite warm). To end our first day of vacation, we had a nice quiet dinner at the hotel cafe.  

Hotel - Lido Beach Resort

Restaurant - Tommy Bahama's Tropical Cafe

"Life Is Not Fair"?

Have you ever heard or used the expression that 'life is not fair'?  If so, can "fair" be defined?  

Throughout the past months, I have encountered many new thoughts and feelings - some old and some new; some good and bad; some happy and others sad.  These have lead me to think about life, specifically my life, which is why I write - hoping to find answers when I read back at what I expressed in the spur of a moment.  

I wish there were a definition for the word "fair" so that the expression above could make sense. 

We make choices in life, which sometimes turn out to be good, and sometimes not.  After the choices are made, many times if the outcome is not the one we had hoped for, we tend to say that it wasn't fair.  However, we should not forget that the choice of what we did was ours and we MADE it.  A good example was our move to MA.  We had the choice of staying in FL or moving.  We knew it was a little crazy to move with an eight week old baby.  We also knew that we didn't have any friends there.  The weather, well...everyone knows how the weather is up in New England.  But, we made the choice.  Once we were there, suffering with the cold and loneliness, it made me feel that life was not fair.  But it was, life was fair, my choice had not been the right one.  Before moving back to FL, though, we had adjusted a little bit more and we had made some great friends - so life was "a little" fair.     

The example above does not fit all of the settings in our life when we say life is not fair.  People get sick. People suffer.  People die.  Loved ones.  Good people.  Kind people.  There are "bad" people that do not get sick.  There are bad people that are "luckier" than others.  There are people who want to be married but never find a partner, and there are those that get married and end up separated/divorced.  Some people want children really badly, and other that don't want them or shouldn't have them, do.  Why!?  Why is it that children get sick? Why do children die?  Why is it that a thief can get into a shoot out and get out injured, while the cop that risked their life is left behind dead? Why? Why? Why? ... 

No matter how hard we think and try to make the right choices, life may not always take the turn(s) we would like.  It may not seem "fair" that we "made the right choice" and things didn't turn out as expected/wanted.  We can question the reasons for which things happen.  We can ask "why me"?  We live through things that make us laugh and smile and other that are painful; things that can change our lives. We see things that can be absolutely beautiful, while others can be horrifying.  It's just life.. There will always good and bad, happiness and sadness, love and "hate"... and no matter what happens, I ask and will ask myself, what is FAIR?

Getting Older...

It's amazing how quickly time goes by.  I remember back, a few years ago, when I thought people in their thirties were "old"...And now that I am past thirty, I am glad.  I'm glad for many reasons, which can seem silly and other not so much.  

First of all, I made it to thirty.  We tend to think that we will live to do and see things that we want, without realizing sometimes how fragile life is.  Many people don't make it to their thirties, and the fact that I have, is a blessing.  I am healthy.  I have a loving family, with a young baby that is the light of my life.  My parents are still living and healthy, as are some of my grandparents.  My brother is a happy and loving person, who will soon, God willing, be a father a well.  I get along with my "extended" family.  I have friends in many places, that I adore, miss, keep in touch with and wish I could see more often.  I have a best friend that is a sister to me, and has been for over 26 years now. Also, having a roof over our heads, food on the table at every meal, the ability to buy things that we need and want, and to be able to study and travel every so often all have to do with the reason that I am glad and blessed to be in my thirties.   Now, as I look into the future, I think that 60 is young, because if you can make it there, with the things I mentioned above, you have so much to live for!  

Live life to the fullest.  Don't stop dreaming because you're getting older.  Enjoy and be thankful for every day you have!  Live, laugh and learn!

Back to reality...

It's amazing how quickly time has gone by.  The last time I wrote, I was thinking about whether or not I "fit in" in different places.  At the time, I was living in Cambridge, MA.  After that, I spent three weeks in Brasil, with some family and friends.  The vacation was nice, and very much needed.  The family helped out with the baby, giving me time to relax, get some rest, and spend some "me" time.  I finally got around to reading, which I love to do but never seem to get around to.  The weather was lovely, the food was great, and the fact that I had no "problems" on my mind gave me a sense of relief.  

Now, I'm back in Florida, and glad to be.  I've met up with family and a few friends in the past two days, and can't explain how happy I am to be able to do so.  Good news and bad news has been shared and now I'm getting settled back into reality.  The search for a new home, a new job, and a daycare.  Daily problems are starting to arise.  And so the new phase of my life begins, and I'm hoping this will turn out to be positive/good.   

I have to say though, I miss our friends back in Boston.  I'm missing the family and friends in Brasil.  Along with that, the peace, relaxation, and time for "me".  Is it always like this?  When we feel like "we get what we want" we miss what we had and wonder what will be!?  Or do I question life too much?  

"Fitting In"

From the day after I turned one, I have never lived in my country.  I left Brasil almost 30 years ago, and even though I've had the opportunity to go back and visit quite often, I have not lived there. I am not complaining, I loved living abroad.  I was blessed to see many new places, meet interesting people and live amongst different cultures.  I learned new languages - a passion of mine - and I am always hoping to learn a few more!  I enjoy traveling and moving from time to time, but I am now confronted with doubts about whether or not I "fit in" where I am.  

  

Even though life was good for my family and I while I was growing up, I missed out on having family near by. I never really spent time with my grandparents, cousins, uncles/aunts, etc., and I sometimes wonder what it would have been like to be around them.  The friends we made in Venezuela, Spain and the United States became our family.  I've lived in a small town in Maryland, in Boston, the Ft. Lauderdale area, Miami, and Cambridge.  I am currently moving back to FL, but wondering if this is the right thing to do.  

Life throws us a few spins once in a while, which is why I'm writing tonight.  The last few years in Florida were spent wondering what life would be like in Boston.  I love the weather in FL, the beaches, lifestyle and our family and friends, of course.  But I didn't feel like I "fit in".  I love to travel; and to get into a car and drive out of FL is a long trip in itself.  The lack of cultural events, museums, history, etc...made me miss Boston.  I started to see that people, not all of course, are very materialistic.  It's all about the car you drive, the clothes you wear, the clubs you go to, etc.  It just wasn't me.   And suddenly....

An offer appeared out of nowhere to come live in Cambridge.  It was like my prayers had been heard!  Of course, we thought about the harsh winter and being far away from our family and friends.  But the thought of getting in the car and being in so many different states in a few hours...All of the museums and historical sites to visit!  Not to mention the exhibits, plays, musicals, etc. that come and go from the city every month.  Giving it little thought, in less than two months I was here.  I arrived in the beginning of January with an eight week old baby.  And in a few weeks, realized that life wasn't going to be so easy.  With very little people that we knew, not being able to go outside much because of the cold, and spending almost every single day with a young baby that only slept and ate, I began to see this wasn't me either.  Time did go by - slowly - and we started to make some friends, so things started to brighten up. Once the summer came, it was great!  We had friends, I went out a lot, we enjoyed the city to the fullest!  Kayaking in the Charles.  Taking walks in the Common. Meeting friends for a stroll at Newbury St....We got away from the city, we had family come and visit and we went to visit family and friends in FL, of course.  But winter is back, and things got "difficult" again.  The days start late and end early.  I can't go outside much. Dear friends have come and gone.  It's just been so hard.  I don't feel like this is the place for me, I don't "fit in".  

We've been thinking about how we would like to go back to FL for many months now- to the sunshine, the family and friends, and the good life we had back then - which we didn't realize.  We know and cherish the friends we have made here and are certain that wherever we may go, they will be in our minds and hearts.  But we're ready to leave... 

Life has thrown us another spin, and our prayers were answered, once again.  We were asked to go back to FL in the beginning of the month and are doing so in a couple of days. Yet for some reason, I find myself asking:  "Is this really what I want?"  "Am I going to be happy?"  "Am I going to 'fit in'?"

I wonder: is it time to head back HOME, to Brasil?  My home that's never been my home?  If I do go back, will I adapt?  Will I get used to living in a big city?  Will I get used to living around family?  Will I "fit in"???

Past, Present & Future

Why is it that people are so concerned with the past and future instead of living for the present?  

"Seize the day!   Carpe Diem!"

The past is gone.  Even though many times we wish we could go back, and change what we've done, or the way we did something.  Something we said or didn't say.... Whatever you did, you chose to do back then.  Deal with it.  If you are happy with the outcome, continue living life happily.  If you are discontent with the results, then see what went wrong, learn from it, and continue to live life, trying to avoid the same "mistake".

The future is something we cannot control. We cannot foresee what will happen.  We cannot prevent something from happening, if we don't know what will happen.  We can only hope that things will turn out the way we want them to.  People tend to think that they can control/prevent things in the future.  Certain things you can TRY to control for the future.  You can eat healthy and work out to TRY to stay healthy.  Even though it doesn't mean you will stay healthy.   You can be healthy and have a good body, but that can't prevent you from getting sick or having accidents...which is the point I'm trying to make.  You cannot control the future.

Live life for the present.  Enjoy each day.  Take in everything that is good and cherish it!  If anything happens that you don't like, let it go.  Life is short, and you have to embrace it!  Do things you enjoy!  Laugh! Cry!   Learn new things!  Love your family, friends and partners! Meet new people.  Help others.   Treat others like you want to be treated.  The world does go "round and round", and what goes around, definitely comes back around.  

Live the PRESENT.  Learn from the past.  Hope for the future.  

Dedicated to my dearest friend, my sister...

I can't express how grateful I am for having you in my life!  Since you are going to be a new mom, anytime now, I wanted to share this poem that was given to me during my baby shower...

In heaven, the story goes that when the time came for a little angel to be born as a baby, she asked God:

-  I hear you are sending me down soon and I wonder, how will I survive?  I am so small and fragile and my wings are not that strong..."

- And God replied:  "From among many, I have chosen a special Angel for you, who awaits your arrival and will always care for you."

- "Here in heaven, all I do is smile and sing.  Is that enough to be happy?"

- "Your Angel will sing to you, will smile at you every day, will play with you...and you will feel a deep love that will make you happy."

- "How will I understand them down there?  I do not speak their language!?"

- "Your Angel will talk to you with kind, beautiful words and with love and tenderness, she will tutor you to understand and be fluent in it."

- "What will I do if I want to speak with you?"

- "Your Angel will put your tiny hands together and she will teach you to pray: that is how you will be able to speak to me."

- "Father, I hear there are malicious men on earth.  Who will defend me from them?"

- "If necessary, your Angel will defend you and guard you with her own life!"

- "I will be sad as I will never see you again."

- "Your Angel will talk to you about me.  She will show you the path to return to me.  Do not fear, I will always be with you."

Heaven was peaceful, voices from earth were heard, and the little angel, feeling rushed and agitated, with tears in her little eyes said:

- "Lord, I am leaving already; tell me her name, what is my Angel's name?"

- "Her name does not matter, you will always call her... MOM."

Never Regret What You Did, Regret What You Didn't Do

Many people believe in different mottos and how to view life.  I firmly believe that we should never regret what we did, only what we didn't do.  If we don't live life fully and try new things, we will be unable to experiment, to find new things that we like/dislike, or to have new things to talk about with family and friends.   We have to learn from trying new things to discover whether we would like to do them again or not.  However, if we live life afraid of trying new things, of having new experiences, of taking risks and sometimes just following our gut feelings, we will never learn.  We will live life in a routine, like a robot; possibly finding out years later that life has been boring and without meaning.  

I myself have done things in the past that I regret.  I know I regret them because I tried something new, and in doing so, my expectations were not met, my feelings were hurt, or I quite possibly simply didn't like the results.  However, I tried.  I can explain to people why it is I like "that" or not.  

On the other hand, I have done things in the past that I do not regret.  They have been experiences that had positive outcomes.  I've met new people, worked in other areas than those that I had always worked in.  I have lived in different places and learned different languages. Even though trying something new is scary, I learned.  I met people that are significant and have changed my life.  I have met others that I did not get along with or have anything in common, so I just learned what I could from the time we spent together, and moved on.  

Therefore, try new things.  Don't be scared.  Take risks.  Live.  Learn.  And remember, never regret what you did, just what you didn't do!